Jules and Julia-esque

That fate-filled day in November where I was greeted at work by being handed an envelope (along with everyone else), I thought was my dream. I thought I’d be living the life of the Stay-At-Home-Mom I always wanted to be. I thought I would have the chance to clean my house for the first time since mat leave. I thought I could get my small sewing business off the ground a bit more. I thought I would have more time with my kidlet and husband. I thought I could make more dinners at home instead of eating out all the time. I thought…..I can do whatever I want and answer to no one.

Well, it’s all true.

I will /can/have done all of that.

The constant looming threat of eventually having no money is always hanging over my head but I am fully confident we will manage.

Some days I clean. Some days I sew. Some days I cook a great supper with a little dessert on the side.

Some days I bake.  I love to bake and usually find myself  straying from the usual recipe mixing it up to become my own delicious creation. I have a decently vast selection of cookbooks I have collected throughout the years. Some I purchased while dating in hopes of owning my own kitchen in a house with my husband.  Some are old magazine subscriptions and books from my favourite Food Network stars and some came as hand-me-downs from my mom. One in particular.  I didn’t get the Five Roses cookbook like my sister got with the good chocolate chip cookie recipe or the go to mac and cheese. I got “The Joy Of Cooking” c1964.

I pulled it down one afternoon when I was feeling adventurous enough to try a new recipe, I dusted it off and opened it up. I suddenly felt like Amy Adams in the girlie movie “Jules and Julia” -Frustrated with a soul-killing job, blogger Julie embarks on a project to prepare all 524 recipes from Julia Child’s “Mastering The Art Of French Cooking”.

Flipping through I found : pg 87 Potato Salad. Yep, I could do that.

Pg 291 Scalloped Potatoes.  Yep, this might not be so hard after all.

Then pg 449 happened. Head Cheese or Brawn. A calf head. “Clean teeth with stiff brush, remove ears, brains, eyes, snout and most of the fat.”

That’s exactly where I got derailed. Not gonna happen.

Ok. Pg 211 has a nice recipe for pancakes like my kidlet was asking for but…..I have some Aunt Jemima in the cupboard.  My gung-ho turned into -add 1c milk and 1 egg.

Apparently they were the best pancakes ever!

Sometimes you have to lose in order to get the win.

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The Little Blogger That Could….

So why write a blog surrounding something that millions of people already do? I’m not a writer, I’m not a connoisseur of fine foods (honestly, I don’t even have a nice enough outfit to go out to a dinner if it means I can’t wear my “good” jeans) I don’t have dreams of “going viral”, getting paid or even a tv deal.

I simply like food.

Food is always there, good or bad.

You can’t get away from it so why not enjoy it? Yes, this comes from someone who weighs 100lbs soaking wet and can’t gain no matter how much or what I eat. Am I lucky to be able to have a connection with food like that? Yes. In my past, I have been called anorexic and told I must be sick. This is slightly just as mean as being called fat. The self-conscious after thought is just the same and just as damaging. When you stop listening to the toxic mouth garbage of others and decide not to care, you look at food in a whole other way.

The careful balance between good and bad is a very fine line. I don’t crave chocolate and cake and bars and cookies like others do but I can demolish a bag of chips in less time then it takes to watch a movie. If I find that my week has been full of crap dinners and snacks, I go into what I call “Whopper Regret”. You know, that feeling of barf-tastickness while it’s going down and then 1/2 hr later, total regret. That’s when it’s time to binge on health.

Food is literally part of the story of my life.

Sometimes I dream of the food I ate on my dream trip to California. That quest I have been on to recreate the most satisfying Tuna Melt I have ever devoured in my life. The most perfectly grilled soft bread, fresh chunks of tuna, perfectly melted but not gross cheddar cheese and all topped off with crunchy green apple slices. It also brings back the most perfect afternoon driving up the highway with the most beautiful coastline views.

The plate of roasted chicken I never ate at New York, New York on the Vegas Strip. I was too busy with a wondering mind of shock from just getting proposed to.

The ever popular Dole Whip from the classic -let’s drive the whole family down to Florida and go to Disney- trip. The exhaustion of a full day of watching my kid have the time of his life, sitting at sundown, watching people have their version of the best day ever. The best $4.50 ever spent.

The dinners we ate before concerts, the pickle races on the windows, beer shared with minor rock stars, the restaurants we met our friends at, celebrated birthdays, weddings, kids and life at.

I’ve become friends with food. It is, was and always will be there. So now…….let’s eat!